The Power of The Plan
Thirty years ago, I wrote a Life Plan as part of a multi-weekend workshop called “Lifegate.” When I signed up for the class, I had some modest ideas in mind about what I might want for my life, mostly focused on career. I paid the fee and submitted my paperwork in November; the workshops started the following January.
What I didn’t know as I wrote the check and completed the pre-work was that I would become pregnant just a few weeks before the inaugural session and my focus would change. As a single mother-to-be, I had some things to figure out – both practically speaking and on a more spiritual or psychological level. I found myself asking questions like, “How am I going to manage work and motherhood?” (a practical question) and “What kind of parent do I envision myself to be?” (a deeper, harder question). I felt relatively confident I could figure out the logistical hurdles. I was nervous, though, about my ability to parent and provide a stable environment, given my history and poor track record with relationships.
For the next four months, as my belly grew, so did the Life Plan. As my son developed, so did I, becoming committed to one overarching goal: To break the chain of dysfunction that plagued my family. For me, that meant working at being the best, most self-aware parent I could be, finding a healthy romantic relationship, creating balance between career and motherhood, and continuing to grow as a person.
Thirty years later, it’s amazing to look back and see how much of that plan came to fruition. Right before my son was born, I started a business, and it supported us for the first twenty years of my son’s life. I somehow managed to work for myself, giving me flexibility I didn’t have on someone else’s payroll. My son has grown into a happy and healthy adult. And, in just a few weeks, my husband and I will celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary.
Beyond all of that were two “stretch” goals, which seemed audacious at the time: Live at the Beach. Write a Book.
Yet…here I am: Looking out at the Pacific Ocean as the author of two (currently being edited!) books. How did all of that happen?
Three ways: First, the written word is a powerful thing. Somehow, writing down (and focusing on!) what I wanted (versus what I was afraid of!) planted a seed that was nurtured…until it bore fruit. Second, I’ve been fortunate enough to be surrounded by an amazing support system of friends and family. As the saying goes, “It takes a village.” And third: Luck. I don’t think we give enough credit to the being-in-the-right-place-at-the-right-time aspects of our lives.
I have been lucky.
It feels good to know how much of the Life Plan has become Life Reality. I'm proud and humbled by it all. And it makes me wonder if it might be time for an updated plan for the next 30 years!
